Holy Innocents Words and music: Copyright 1995 Cáit Finnegan
Daddy's preaching this week dear, He cannot be with us here But Jesus and His mother are our friends. And they know just how we feel When we pray that Daddy's love was real For Scripture tells us real love never ends.
Daddy serves two masters, love. One's a serpent, One's a Dove. And the serpent tells him love is really sin. And if he gives in to this love That comes to him from God above Then the serpent says he'll lose his life within.
Holy Innocent child of mine You're being punished for our crime Against a Roman law forbidding priests to wed You are among the little ones Many daughters, many sons Whose need for father's love is heaven fed.
There's no room in the Roman Inn. Pope Herod's codes say you're a sin But there's a loving Christ outside the door. And the stable doors of His Church are wide Inviting us to come inside And dream the dream with Christ Whom we adore.
Where Charity and Love prevail We know we will find God 'tho laws forbidding Love all fail Those laws have left you scarred. But while your Daddy's soul's in jail And from his heart you're barred Know that Mommy loves you, you're her gift from God.
It boils down to love or apathy in a collar!
The scandalous REALITY is that years ago many women, in order to get paternal support from Roman Catholic priests who fathered children, had to sign CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENTS.
This meant these women agreed to SAY NO MORE about the priest being the father of these children--so the children might eat and have a place to live. Most often, from those we heard from NO life insurance on the father was taken out for the benefit of raising the child. No health insurance was taken for the child by the father. The settlement (hush money) was rarely enough to raise a child from infancy to the age of majority (much less pay for Catholic school tuition--should a mother make that choice!).
Today, many of these children are adults or young adults. I have waited over 20 years for these days! These children signed NOTHING and owe NOTHING to protect the "good name" of the scoundrels who have ignored them for a career in religion.
We signed nothing and these stories were told to us long before ANY confidentiality agreements were signed by the mothers. So here is the website about this child neglect so a priest-dad might save his own sense of a holy lifestyle, while ignoring his child, and even his children (by one or more women).
Now, it's time for the kids' stories!
Over the years we've talked with over 45 women who have had children by priests and have been left to care for those children alone. More than 20 of them remain in touch with us.
As a result of the tragic situation of children who receive nothing or merely financial support from their priest-fathers and of women who are left feeling emotionally raped by the institutional Church when they fight for the rights of their children, we have initiated HOLY INNOCENTS.
The birth of Jesus Christ, to a loving mother who'd been the object of talk and shame over her unorthodox pregnancy, continues in another form in the Church today. And there is still no room in the inn, no hospitality from the Catholic community. Catholic shepherds have not recognized the children of priests or heard the Good Tidings of great joy which these children have brought to their own loving mothers. Nor do they recognize the prophetic challenge of these children to the unenforceable and frequently ignored mandate of clerical celibacy. Heartless jokes from the Church strike back: She got involved with a priest; she got what she deserved!" or "These children are not the Christ Child born of the Virgin Mary or conceived by the Holy Spirit!"
To those taunts we answer that these children were conceived and carried to term in love (at least on the part of the mothers). Their mothers believed the words of love expressed by the priest-fathers. These mothers, whether morally innocent or not, had the love and strength and spiritual convictions not to abort, even when pressured by the priests or their superiors to do so. These mothers are human beings suffering with their children who have been abandoned by their "deadbeat dads." They are Christians left to suffer alone by their own Church, lest charity toward them convict the priests of their double standards. Instead of finding charity these mothers are treated like whores (or even worse since the Church ministers to whores). They must fight in the civil courts for their legal rights and the rights of their children because, in far too many cases, working out these problems within the Church only ends in injustice toward the mother and child. These women are called public sinners by private sinners, and that title somehow legitimizes our public stoning of them. Yet we know that none of us can cast the first stone. All this while "father" continues in ministry to the Church, teaching Catholic morality in pulpits and universities around the world.
The Christian Feast of Holy Innocents further highlights the injustices and double standards adopted, in fact if not in theory, by those priests or their superiors who encourage abortions because they place greater value on the reputation, position and career of the priest-dads than on the sanctity of the child's life. Like Herod they panic at the thought that their position of respect and authority could be challenged by the birth of an innocent child. The unborn child's right to life, love and the pursuit of happiness is sacrificed to protect father's hypocritical status of moral leadership within the community and the Christian Church.
Such abortions "in the name of God," make us cringe, but more than that we want to help. I want to introduce you to the mothers and the children of priests so often left worn and weary after their legal battle with the representatives of Christ on Earth. so often they are still frightened to break silence and tell the People of God what they've experienced as part of the stoning. They are too frightened to speak out and to let their experiences be made public and thus lead to awareness on the part of the People of God and perhaps to reform. Those in the midst of their legal battle are even more reticent because they are intimidated by Church lawyers and often by their own poorly chosen lawyers who do not want to rock the Bark or who themselves secretly disrespect these women.
The mothers and their children...
Of course we cannot name names or break the anonymity and confidentiality accorded these women by us, but we can introduce you to some of them, if you in turn can meet them with the eyes and ears of your hearts as we briefly tell some of their stories (names have all been changed, of course).
Alice decided to go ahead with legal procedures to obtain child support from the father of her child who is an active priest. Her bishop encouraged her to put her child up for adoption to protect the priest's reputation in the diocese since she lived and worked in that same diocese. his method of encouraging her was to tell her she was selfish in wanting to fulfill her maternal instincts and raise her own child. she should put her child up for adoption, he said, because she was single and the child needed two parents (he did not add that in that case Father wouldn't have to face his moral and legal responsibility).
It's been painful and ugly and it's getting uglier since she decided to press for child support. She has absorbed the entire financial burden of raising this child, including high medical bills and daily child care as she works overtime to get these bills paid. During the first Winter she had no oil for heat and no money to buy the oil. When she spoke with the father of her child he accused her of trying to ruin his career and stated that he was a good priest and wouldn't let her ruin him with this paternity suit. "What are you going to do, call me every time this kid gets sick?" There is no concern for his child. There is no room at the inn, no hospitality in this heart for this beautiful innocent child.
Terri came to us in 1987 deeply in love with Fr. Pat and for the next several years tried to work on the relationship which was often rocky. From day one it seemed obvious to us that Pat didn't love Terri, but that's a hard pill to swallow--and sometimes it was a still harder one for us to dole out to her as we talked through the years. she so much loved him and wanted his love in return that she believed his words and love-making as some vague commitment or hope for a future together, even unmarried. She became pregnant and he seemed to support her through the pregnancy, but after the child was born he told her that he was in love with yet another woman who loved him enough to put their child up for adoption. Terri, in shock, began to raise her child alone. She suffered through the questions and memories racing around in her head. which is worse, the deception or the rejection--or does it matter any more? Terri's Catholic neighbors tortured her with taunts and comments to her face and behind her back. She worked part-time and needed a great deal of emotional support as she worked through all of this.
In both of the above situations of Alice and Terri these women and children survived and grew strong. Alice is raising her son alone and the priest has begun to help financially. Terri eventually married (not the priest) and is raising a family with her husband.
We could write hundreds of stories about women involved with priests who have no intention of honoring them or the word love. But here we are concerned about the children...
HOLY INNOCENTS addresses the specific problems of these women and children. As they've been told to us, the problems of these women are those of feeling totally alone and abandoned by family, friends, Church and the priest they trusted and loved. Idealism and hope cave in rapidly when reality and practical problems must be faced immediately.
We try to put them in touch with other women (and children when possible) around the world who have survived similar situations, so that nobody goes through such an ordeal thinking she is alone.
TO DONATE to a Financial Aid Fund to be used for counseling or for legal assistance when needed by the HOLY INNOCENTS, or just for help with living expenses, make checks payable to "Good Tidings" and send to:
Good Tidings PO Box 283 Canadensis, PA 18325 570-595-2705 E-mail address: GoodTidings@aol.com
Please indicate if your donation is for the needs of the Holy Innocents
Good Tidings is incorporated in Pennsylvania as a 501 (c)(3) non-profit organization and donations are tax deductible.
The birth of Jesus Christ, to a loving mother who'd been the object of talk and shame over her unorthodox pregnancy, continues in another form in the Church today. And there is still no room in the inn, no hospitality from the Catholic community. Catholic shepherds have not recognized the children of priests or heard the Good Tidings of great joy which these children have brought to their own loving mothers. Nor do they recognize the prophetic challenge of these children to the unenforceable and frequently ignored mandate of clerical celibacy. Heartless jokes from the Church strike back: She got involved with a priest; she got what she deserved!" or "These children are not the Christ Child born of the Virgin Mary or conceived by the Holy Spirit!" 
